Grafton Judies Hail Macbeth

Grafton judies clocked our Macca’s charms

An’ hasty-like slammed in fresh bubble-gum

Many judies shimmied in ‘is red an’ ‘airy arms

An’ fantasised about ‘is crackin’ kilted bum.

But Macca couldn’ grasp de Grafton lingo

Our chewin’, darlin’ judies quickly uttered

Mobbed by grisly grannies ‘ere for bingo

Many a falsie bosom ‘eaved and fluttered.

Our sweatin’ grannies licked der cherry lips

An’ gasped dey’d never seen a better feller

Clockin’ ‘airy chest an’ ‘airy arms an’ ‘airy ‘ips

As Macca fled, three judies snarled ‘Yer yeller’.

Our Macca couldn’ hack it back on gruesome Dunsinane

Or in de Grafton, Speke, Sefy Park or even Penny Lane.

(The second, and concluding, sonnet concerning Macbeth,

who journeyed south to become our Macca.  He became

a proud Liverpool Scot.)