We Had To Go To War [1914]

Let all those historians now abroad
Telling us this Great War was just
Take note
I’m sending you to represent us
In the field, so to speak.

Except, of course, the field has disappeared
Along with every tree and hedge and nearly every rat
So you’ll do well to land heavily on a plank
And not in an oozing waste of mud and membrane
Just fancy that!

You said yourself that this Great War just needed to be fought
So it’s only right that you yourself shall fiercely risk
Your soft and puny body, oh so easily pierced
By Spandau or savagely speeding shrapnel
Rendering all your earnest thoughts missing in action.

Presumed dead.